Not sure if this is the cemetery of the Sale family or just a half price sale on family plots.
After 6 months of phone calls, and letters with no response in regards to our request to bury our dead here on The Poor Farm, I reached out again to the zoning office in our county. I was told a gentleman would arrive today with our permit application(s). Please note the pleural designation.
And so he did. With a knock on the door I was pleasantly served with three building applications. I'm not being sarcastic here, he was a genuinely friendly guy. He even played with our dog.
The first two applications were just the standard ones for new above ground building projects that mirrored the application we completed when we built this Looney Bin. One for the mudroom to be added over the concrete slab at the front of our wee circular home, and one for the new (used) barn/millhouse being dismantled as I write. These basic "Application for Improvement Location" Permits are just three pages and do not require a fee payment. If I recall that comes later at about $150 each.
The third permit, for future underground activity, is the one I am most excited about.
Yes, I am very excited about planning our final resting area, our lounge for the newly deceased, our room temperature resort, our Horizontal Hilton, our localita' di decomposizione. Sorry, a career in hospice nursing has long term warping effects.. As the gentleman who dropped off said permit this am said, "I've never heard of anyone wanting to do this before, this should be interesting."
Yes, yes it will. The permit is called "Application for Special Use" and is five pages with three pages of intructions. Not too bad. The fees however are heftier. $175 just for the initial application plus another $40-$70 to pay for the notice that goes in the paper about a public hearing that will take place. After the hearing the Zoning Board of Appeals "approves, modifies or denies request" for this special use permit.
It's nice to be called special isn't it.?
Keith's Ideal Final Resting Spot
My Dream Final Resting Spot. I love road trips.
After that the County Soil and Water Conservation folk get involved to ensure no public waterways are compromised. This will run an additional $40-$150 depending on the complexity of the report that must be given back to the zoning board. Since we do not plan to build our cemetery near river, ocean or lake, I am hopeful this part of the process will be minimal.
There you have it. A fair amount of paperwork, map drawing, and public explanation about why we want to bury our own dead in an economically and ecologically responsible manner, rather than pay $10,000 for some strangers to do it while utilizing caustic chemicals, steel coffins and concrete vaults that never decompose.
Should be a walk in the park.